Today, I received a phone call from my first love,Kevin. My husband and I were taking a well deserved break from working on this “never ending” quest of finishing our home when, my cell phone rings.I knew who it was as soon as I heard his voice. I met this man almost 30 years ago, when I was a starry-eyed 17 year old and he was a 19 year old handsome dog young man. Two years ago, he was doing some home renovations so we let him give us an estimate which is how he had the number in the first place( when I didn’t give him the gig, I thought he would have deleted the number..not.)
Anywhoo, he was talking all willy-nilly like almost 30 damned years had not passed. I wonder if he thought that I would have invited him over or something (uh, no bruh.) But, this the funny thing, the entire time I am listening to him, I am looking over at my husband and thanking God with every breath that I am in the place I am in now. It is a good place, a great place. My husband is a good man, he is a “no drama” sort of guy and I need that in my life. My younger years were filled with mega, godzilla-style type of drama and only a fool wants to live in that sort of heartache. If you have to wonder where your man is, that’s a red flag for ya.
Kevin has often told me that I was the one that got away. I believe in his story that I am. I have always been a steady, reliable type of person. My story, however, is quite the opposite because, I am glad that I shook myself away from that world. I look back on it with amazement and wonder that I even survived all of that drama and did not end up bitter like so many women do.
As I hung up the phone with him, I couldn’t help but snuggle up to my husband. Yep, I made out like a bandit and hit the jack pot. There is nothing like the peace of mind knowing that you have someone who is truly on your side, who has your back, who loves you beyond measure and would never hurt you.
Kevin, I hope that you find that kind of love for yourself, but, it ain’t here bruh.